Cookies and free willJan 24, 2022
Growing up I sold a lot of stuff. I mean I could probably be a high grossing sales rep for as much practice as I have had. I hated it too. Going door to door to my precious and not so precious neighbors practically begging them to pay good money for crap goods so I could keep doing what I loved. By the time I graduated high school, I knew people would see me coming with my paper in hand and pull the shades down and shut off the lights. I was a flipping pariah but I had cute uniforms. Now I learned how to sell from the best because I cut my teeth as a door to door salesman wearing my green uniform and lugging boxes of thin mints. I loved selling those cookies because people loved buying them. You could knock out your allotment in an afternoon if you hustled. I would go all over and I knew where the shut-ins lived. They especially loved seeing me because well I was cute, persistent and I had legal crack. I knew all the flavors and had a story for each variety. You NEEDED three boxes of thin mints because you had to put one in the freezer and eat the other two. You NEEDED a box of peanut butter patties because your husband loves peanut butter. Why don’t you buy a couple of boxes of those Trefoil cookies for your grans? They can eat them and still have room for dinner. My sales pitch worked because I was a believer. Girl Scout cookies were the best and they only came around once a year.
Look, I know times have changed and we’ve been in the midst of a pandemic and the little Juliettes are not making bank but I can’t believe how much the marketing of the cookies has changed. They’ve changed the names and the recipe of some of those old flavors. You can now get GS cookies anytime. As an adult, one of things that saved me was that they were only sold once a year and it was usually right before or during lent so there was a limit. Now I can give up chocolate and still get my GS cookie fix. And do you know what I heard the other day? You can now DOOR DASH the cookies and credit your favorite little Green Bean. No more boxes of inventory filling up the living room to eat, I mean to sell. What kind of business acumen are our little ones going to have if they don’t have to go door to door? How will our daughters learn to receive rejection with grace and aplomb? OK, I’m not really ready to protest the changes. I understand from a safety standpoint this is probably best. I also understand the GS took an economic hit from the pandemic just like the rest of us. I’m actually ok with the changes as it keeps me from buying 20 or even 2 boxes. Look, I have a problem with cookies, especially ones with a history so it all works out in the end.
Sometimes the story or the memory is the best part of a food. I’m looking at you Oreo, my 100 year old nemesis. I mean I’ve only been eating them for 1/2 century but they have had 50 years on me to have gotten the recipe right. I’m not sure why I love them so much. The cookie isn’t even that good. I guess it’s the filling. Double stuff, Easter filling with crystal sugar, pop rock filling, chocolate filling. I love them all. I actually now have a rule that I won’t even try any new flavor of Oreo, candy bar or Girl Scout cookie. I know what I love and I don’t have any more love in my heart or stomach for more variety. Modern day marketing won’t break me. Why you might ask since I clearly love cookies?
Awareness. For years I believed that cookies held sway over me. I felt like I was handing the cookies all of my free will. I now know that’s just not true. A cookie isn’t magic but rather a list of ingredients that have been amalgamated to cause maximum impact. It's a mixture of chemicals that cause a chemical reaction in my brain that drowns out all of the other chemical reactions in my body that I don’t want to feel. Except I do want to feel the negative feelings. I want to be present in all the areas of my life including the ones that push me to grow. Allowing myself to feel the emotions and not avoid them with food gives me back ALL of my power. Food can’t hold you hostage, only your brain can choose that path. Take back your power my friend.
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